Sixteen Things I Learned at Sixteen
The past year has been a year of growth. I have gone from someone who allowed people to walk all over me, to someone who acted recklessly, to someone with a voice.
Sixteen is a year of awkward situations, sense of self, and realization.
Here are sixteen lessons I learned at sixteen:
1.) People are not medicine.
I’ve heard this quote a million times and haven’t been able to quite understand it until this year. When we are going through hardship we tend to turn to those close to us and clutch onto them, clinging onto living in the moment rather than dealing with our emotions. It’s not until you lose those people or you’re alone in your room at 2:00 A.M., crying to a song you used to love that you will understand this lesson.
2.) Tea is an amazing thing
On sleepy mornings where you are so tired you feel displaced from the world, there is nothing that kickstarts a good day like a hot cup of tea.
3.) Taking Care of Yourself is COOL
Since the beginning of high school, endless words of people not treating their bodies and minds well filled up the classrooms and poured into the halls.
“I didn’t sleep at all last night.”
“I didn’t eat breakfast this morning and got up five minutes before I had to leave for school.”
“This weekend I blacked.”
These negative habits seemed to turn into a competition. Who can push themselves the furthest? Who could take care of themselves the least? Who is the most disorganized and procrastinated the most or over studied for that test that won’t matter in five years?
As a night owl, I know the endless process of restlessness from staying up late; it isn’t a habit that should be glamorized. When you sleep well you feel better and feel energized. When you actually buckle down and study, your anxiety levels will rocket down.
Go to bed early. Get up early. Give yourself time to rest so you can push hard through your day and be a productive person. Take care of yourself. Stay in on a Saturday night if you’re too tired. Listen to your body. Listen to your mind. Love yourself.
In relation to doing what works best for you…
4.) You do not have to fall under a label
You are allowed to love anything you want. Don’t belittle yourself as someone who only falls under one category. If you’re feeling blue eyeliner and a velvet dress one day then the next sweatpants and no makeup, that is one hundred percent okay. You are living for you, not those around you. Whatever you are comfortable and confident in.
So many times I found myself thinking, “is this indie” or “is this hippie enough for my style?” In fear that those around me would deem me as fake if I didn’t stick to that one label I had stuck on myself.
If you’re worried someone will judge you because it doesn’t fall under your label, fuck that. Small minded people come in many different forms. We are all humans.
Some nights you will feel like spending hours in a bookstore, raking through novels and not answering your phone. Some nights you want to party and have fun with your friends.
Do not label yourself. Do not allow your peers to label you.
You are you and no one else in this world is the exact same human as you. You are unique and wonderful. #selflove
5.) Being vegan is the best thing I have ever done for myself
The word vegan has a lot of weight to it. Kind of like the words feminist and equality. You never know if you’ll get in a disagreement with someone on the subject, so you walk on eggshells around it, as if stating your belief will start the next world war.
As someone who is extremely lactose intolerant, and gets nauseous at the smell of ice cream, this is what works for me.
Through my life I’ve always been accepting to anyone vegetarian or vegan. People around me were not. I’ve learned that this is my body and what I put into it is my decision. If you eat meat and dairy, that’s your decision. If I’m vegan, that’s mine.
6.) Open your mind before you open your mouth
One of my biggest weaknesses is acting on emotion. It’s something I don’t like to admit.
Slowly, I am learning to take a deep breath and allow myself to feel the emotion thoroughly and think about my actions before I react.
Not everyone will understand the world in the light you do.
Sometimes you have to accept that you aren’t always right and other people haven’t learned that lesson yet.
“I almost said something.. almost.. my entire life would have turned out different if I had.”
7.) Even if you can’t dance and you want to dance.. dance.
In line at the grocery store, at a party, driving to work, making dinner…
8.) Nostalgia is a dirty liar who insists things were better than they were
I spent hours on end reminiscing on my old life with my old friends from years past. The other day I had the opportunity to catch up with one of those old friends and I realized that all the memories from my times with them had been glamorized in my head. Things always seem better than they were when you look back on the old photos. Living in the present is important. Don’t let regret and nostalgia cloud your thoughts.
9.) Everything is temporary
10.) Ben Howard will never get old
Right now I’m hooked on the song Evergreen on his most recent album. His warm acoustics send my thoughts back to summer time in the mountains, driving in the sunshine.
11.) Hobbies are important
That thing you’ve always wanted to try and you thought about it or signed up for a class but never went? Go to another class. Try it again.
12.) Outside of your comfort zone is where life begins
Almost all the incredible people I have been given the opportunity to get close with are people I would have never gotten to know if I hadn’t shoved myself outside of my comfort zone.
It starts with putting yourself out there. Fear only exists inside your own head.
13.) Let people go
You should forgive someone but never for the same mistake twice. Even if your paths cross often, it doesn’t necessarily mean you need to be friends. Being friendly and polite and being fake are two different things. Give all the love you have to those around you but don’t sit there and let someone walk all over you. You can let people go in a nondramatic fashion where you are just acquaintances with memories.
14.) I love edamame.
15.) Look at your parents as human beings, not parents. Listen to them. Respect them.
They were your age once too. They have seen and experienced a lot more than you have.
Teenage girls and their moms have this secret pact to being sworn enemies. This year I’ve learned that your mom is the best friend you will ever have. Her intentions are always gold and she is your number one fan.
16.) Go for it
The worst thing that can happen is you can fail. If you do, get back up and try again.
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